GLH Playground

Psycho Woman Throws Knives At Children

2011-05-05T20:00:00.000-04:00

Good Christian family values here.

The Funniest Parody I've Ever Seen - Chimp Baby vs. Human Baby

2011-04-05T21:30:00.001-04:00

You can tell that the original version of the film was really warped too.

Oil Wrestlers from Greece Oil Up

2011-03-26T07:56:00.001-04:00

Very Hot!

Damnitol Commercial

2011-03-25T20:00:00.003-04:00

Talk about a product for today's world.

Shake Weight Parody

2011-03-18T20:45:00.000-04:00

When I first saw the commercials, I couldn't stop laughing.

EHarmony Commercial Parodies

2011-03-12T07:00:00.002-05:00

Talk about a corporation that deserves mocking!

eharmonize

eCousinality Commercial (eHarmony Parody)

eharmony spoof

eHarmony parody 'bHarmony'

Fab Commercial Parodies

2011-03-05T11:45:00.000-05:00

This is evil, but fun.

A Folgers Parody Without the Sinister Mrs. Olson

2011-02-28T19:30:00.001-05:00

Folgers proves that their commercials are evil, even without Mrs. Olson.

The Evil Mrs. Olson Strikes Again

2011-02-24T20:00:00.000-05:00

This is almost as warped as the real commercial.

Another Fab Folgers Commercial Parody

2011-02-19T11:45:00.001-05:00

The evil Ms. Olson strikes again!

A Musical Goodbye to Mubarek

2011-02-12T17:41:00.003-05:00

Rick at Ten Percent thought of this. I'm so jealous that I didn't.

Folgers Satire

2011-02-10T23:15:00.002-05:00

Mrs. Olson always was sinister.

Cute Funny Flexing and Posing Videos from Hairy Musclemen

2011-02-08T19:45:00.003-05:00

Enjoy the eye candy.

36 Hour Cialis Commercial Parody

2011-02-06T21:30:00.000-05:00

Cialis appears to cause a rather large problem.

Extremely Creepy Doll Commercial

2011-02-05T12:07:00.001-05:00

Makes you want to run out and buy the piece of shit, doesn't it.

Frightening Children with Bible Stories

2011-02-05T11:32:00.001-05:00

There is a lot of twisted shit in the Bible.

Gay Scientists Isolate Christian Gene

2011-01-26T08:15:00.002-05:00

Hat Tip: Stroppyblog

If only Christianity could be cured, giggle.

Art Inspired by Atheism and Science

2011-01-24T10:45:00.000-05:00

You can learn more about the artist and her views on life at The Jewmanist.

The Worst YouTube Video Ever

2011-01-22T11:41:00.002-05:00

Sarah Palin's supporters are so pathetic they are funny.

The twanging is so irritating you are forgiven if you don't listen to the whole thing.

Matt Taibbi Is Hot

2011-01-20T19:51:00.003-05:00

Check out this Google Image Search.

I have liked Matt Taibbi's writing for some time now, but I didn't notice how hot he is before. I Can't Believe It's Not a Democracy had a link to a Taibbi commentary with photo that got me thinking....

"Date 50+ Women"

2011-01-11T20:19:00.003-05:00

Every once in a while websites I visit are running one of these ads. It's comforting to know that targeted advertising doesn't always work that well. The ads show pictures of women over the age of 50 that the site's audience presumably would find attractive.

Something occurred to me. The ads would be much funnier if they meant "Date More Than 50 Women." Of course, the guys going to the site would have to be extremely slutty and energetic, but the idea makes me giggle.

There's always something to laugh about if you are sufficiently observant.

People Who Are Funnier Than Jon Stewart:Kate Clinton

2011-01-07T19:00:00.002-05:00

Which of These Books Have You Read?

2011-01-01T21:03:00.003-05:00

This game was shamelessly swiped from Facebook. Here are the rules. (I'm cheating by doing it hear instead of on Facebook.)

Have you read more than 6 of these books? The BBC believes most people will have read only 6 of the 100 books listed here. Instructions: Copy this into your NOTES. Bold those books you've read in their entirety, italicize the ones you started but didn't finish or read an excerpt. Tag other book nerds. Tag me as well so I can see your responses!

(I noticed that a few numbers are missing. I don't know why, but this is just a game.)

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
2 The Lord of the Rings- JRR TOLKIEN
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
6 The Bible
7 Wuthering Heights -Emily Bronte
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulk
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19 The Time Traveler’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34 Emma -Jane Austen
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen
36 The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40 Winnie the Pooh - A.A. Milne
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52 Dune - Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding
69 Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses - James Joyce
76 The Inferno - Dante
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession - AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte’s Web - E.B. White
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery X6
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

I read 21 of these books. I read part of The Hobbit and the Bible, but both were too incredibly boring to finish. Reading all of Shakespeare's works is something I'm far from having completed.

People Who Are Funnier Than Jon Stewart: Brett Butler

2010-12-31T22:00:00.002-05:00

Jokes.com

Brett Butler - Short Mom

comedians.comedycentral.com

Funny Jokes

Funny Videos

Daniel Tosh Stand-Up

The audio on this video needs a bit of help, but it's worth the effort.

Jokes.com

Brett Butler - Short Mom

comedians.comedycentral.com

Funny Jokes

Funny Videos

Daniel Tosh Stand-Up

Triumph the Insult Comic Dog at the Michael Jackson Trial

2010-12-27T18:00:00.001-05:00

It's so wrong, it's right.

A Puppet That Is Funnier Than Jon Stewart: Triumph the Insult Comic Dog

2010-12-24T22:00:00.001-05:00

This dog may be male, but he is one hell of a bitch.

The O'Reilly part is a setup for Triumph the Comic Insult Dog:

Kinsey Sicks Destroy Civilization with Gaga Parody

2010-12-21T22:06:00.002-05:00

Civilization is overrated.

People Who Are Funnier Than Jon Stewart: Paul Chowdhry

2010-12-17T19:54:00.003-05:00

He's a lot cuter than Stewart too.

A Sport That Is Funnier Than Jon Stewart: Curling

2010-12-10T19:45:00.002-05:00

People Who Are Funnier Than Jon Stewart: Vong Sundara

2010-12-03T19:30:00.001-05:00

A Geeky Game From The Punk Patriot

2010-12-02T21:59:00.002-05:00

From The Punk Patriot:

1) Go to Google Translate
2) Select German-> German
3) Copy and past the following: pv zk pv pv zk pv zk kz zk pv pv pv zk pv zk zk pzk pzk pvzkpkzvpvzk kkkkkk bsch
4) Click listen
5) Be amazed.

You get some interesting results by switching other languages for German. Finnish, French, Italian, and Spanish are especially fun in Google Translate.

People Who Are Funnier Than Jon Stewart: Ellen DeGeneres

2010-11-26T19:00:00.003-05:00

People Who Were Funnier Than Jon Stewart: George Carlin

2010-11-19T19:09:00.002-05:00

People Who Are Funnier Than Jon Stewart: Wanda Sykes

2010-11-12T20:00:00.003-05:00

Hard Hitting Commentary From Taiwan on the Late Night Talk Show Wars

2010-11-09T22:15:00.002-05:00

This is a lot more entertaining than the late night ~~snores~~ talk shows.

People Who Are Funnier Than Jon Stewart: Margaret Cho

2010-11-05T18:45:00.001-04:00

The Humor of Linda McMahon's Senate Campaign

2010-11-02T09:00:00.004-04:00

You can say a lot of terrible things about Linda McMahon, and they would be true. But, she has had the virtue of adding much needed humor to this year's nauseating election cycle. I should point out that when I was looking over past videos to put up again, I found that many of them had been taken down due to pressure from the WWE.

Here's the best political parody video I've ever seen. It was surgical in its brilliance.

Here's some hysterical video from the WWE where Linda pretends to threaten to castrate her husband.

Linda Will Cut Vince's Grape Fruits
Uploaded by mohanedkingofkings. - See more comedy videos.

Here's Ms. McMahon's current son in law, talking about the simulated necrophilia scene he appeared in while Linda was WWE CEO.

Here's something from a posting on my more serious blog, in which I explore the idea of a Sunday School run by Linda McMahon.

Now, I've found out that "Superstar Billy Graham," a former pro wrestler has been making some allegations about her that add to the comedic value of her GOP Senate campaign. From the Hartford Courant 11/18/09:
"She may look like a Sunday school teacher," Graham said, but he insists nothing could be further from the truth. "Linda McMahon's hands are as bloody as her husband's because she is aware of every move in the ring," he said.

That quote is hysterical. This is the image I get of a Sunday school run by former WWE CEO Linda McMahon.

1) The little girls would all have breast implants.

2) The little boys would hit each other with garbage cans and slam each other into precut tables.

3) The baby Jesus would have his own Titantron with death metal music.

4) The image of the "Virgin" Mary would be with her in a thong.

I'm really surprised that standup comics didn't mine her campaign for more material.

There was an even earlier posting where I took full advantage of her campaign's snark potential, asking these questions.

Is the campaign fake like the WWE?

Will she challenge her opponents to a "bra and panties match"?

If she gets elected, will she clock Harry Reid with a steel chair or a garbage can?

Will she hire an evil manager who is faking being foreign to alienate dim people and cheat in the election for her?

Will she have an announcer go on, and on, and on about her "puppies"?

Will she create a really weird angle where she fakes her death?

Will she be a Diva and brag that she is better looking than all the other women in the Senate and can kick their asses?

Will she make her Senate staffers kiss her rear end on nationwide television?

Will she get breast implants and campaign in a bikini?

Will she make WWE performers debate her and have the debates fixed in her favor?

Funny Video About Nevada Senate Race

2010-11-02T07:00:00.000-04:00

Sharon Angle and Harry Reid both are easy targets for satire.

British Petroleum Is Creepy

2010-10-31T20:00:00.000-04:00

I love the Kinsey Sicks.

Hairy Hunks From Flickr

2010-10-30T07:15:00.002-04:00

Click to make bigger. (If you have a touch screen, you can rub to make bigger.)

Photo: MACSURAK

Photo: Hairy_Jacques

Photo: Hairy_Jacques

People Who Were Funnier Than Jon Stewart: Mitch Hedberg

2010-10-29T19:00:00.001-04:00

Rachel Maddow Talks About a Guy's Ugly Tie

2010-10-25T07:00:00.000-04:00

Nate and the gnarly necktie from The Rachel Maddow Show on Vimeo.

People Who Are Funnier Than Jon Stewart: Cloris Leachman

2010-10-22T18:26:00.003-04:00

Even before Jon Stewart's Daily Show shifted to the right in 2009, told sexist and homophobic jokes, and accused CODEPINK of being insane, Stewart was overrated.

So, I thought it would be fun to run a series of videos representing some of the multitude of comics funnier than Jon Stewart.

The Comedy Central Roast of Bob Saget

Cloris Leachman Pt 1

www.comedycentral.com

Ugly Americans New Episodes

Nick Swardson's Pretend Time

Night of Too Many Stars

The Comedy Central Roast of Bob Saget

Cloris Leachman Pt. 2

www.comedycentral.com

Ugly Americans New Episodes

Nick Swardson's Pretend Time

Night of Too Many Stars

Parody of "I'm Not a Witch" Commercial

2010-10-17T23:59:00.001-04:00

This is delightfully surreal. (Hat Tip: Skippy the Bush Kangaroo)

Drinking the Kool-Aid

2010-10-11T20:33:00.002-04:00

distributorcapNY has a lot of cogent commentary punctuated by funny video parodies and Photoshop gags. This is one of his better videos.

The blog posting has more serious commentary on the teabaggers.

Silly, Hairy Muscleboy Acts Talks a Lot and Shows Off

2010-09-18T23:48:00.000-04:00

The Full Scene of Simulated Necrophilia from Linda McMahon's WWE

2010-09-12T23:10:00.000-04:00

Cute Comic Makes Fun of Ben Quayle

2010-09-05T09:43:00.001-04:00

Hat tip: Media Crashers

Want to See Randy Couture With Hair?

2010-08-21T14:48:00.003-04:00

UFC hunk Randy Couture had beautiful wavy hair back in 1990. This is a Greco roman match (no leg holds/moves).

Linda McMahon's Current Son In Law Talks About Doing Simulated Necrophilia Scene

2010-08-16T20:00:00.000-04:00

This is how things worked in the WWE while Linda McMahon was CEO.

Linda McMahon's campaign sure does appeal to those with a warped sense of humor.

An Atheist Gets Fed Up With a Fundie on Facebook

2010-08-13T21:55:00.001-04:00

The results are comical.

Holy Mormon Underwear, Batman!

2010-07-28T15:57:00.000-04:00

Giggle.

Sarah Palin's Educational Video on Geography

2010-07-25T21:00:00.000-04:00

That woman seems to exist to inspire snark.

You're a Homo, I'm a Homo

2010-07-23T20:45:00.001-04:00

How dare they make fun of closeted homophobes? LOL

Hat Tip: Blogactive

Hunk of the Day

2010-07-21T07:18:00.002-04:00

Hunk of the Day, from Hunk du Jourgreat free widgetsWidgetboxMore info

I know I'll get bored with their taste in hunks eventually, so it goes here, not on the side of the page. In the meantime, enjoy.

(Hat Tip: Wicked Gay Blog)

Politico Editorial Meeting

2010-07-18T12:35:00.002-04:00

I swiped this baby from B12 Solopsism.

For people who don't follow politics obsessively, Politico is a far right propaganda blog that plays at being a serious news source on politics.

2 Hairy Chested Men, A 100 lb. Dumbell,& A Garage

2010-07-17T02:18:00.001-04:00

If Atheists Acted Religious...

2010-07-14T09:56:00.002-04:00

Swiped from The Gaytheist Agenda:

Hooray for Wondermark!

2010-07-10T20:06:00.002-04:00

Wondermark is a fabulous cartoon with contemporary themes drawn in a 19th Century style. The most recent one, linked below, fabulous.

#637; In which Growth is noticed

I wish The Onion still carried it.

Making Fun of Valuing People Based on Income

2010-07-08T19:30:00.000-04:00

Hat Tip: Ten Percent

Magical Mormon Underwear

2010-07-05T23:34:00.001-04:00

From The Thinking Atheist's feature, "You've got to be shitting me."

The Punk Patriot Makes Fun of Ayn Rand

2010-07-05T14:00:00.000-04:00

I'm amused.

Anyway, he also has a blog.

Peaches Christ Sings "Be My Zombie"

2010-06-28T20:48:00.001-04:00

Sadly, Zombie Jesus doesn't make a cameo.

Gratuitous Hairy Muscle

2010-06-24T19:49:00.001-04:00

There's never enough.

Cool Video of People Expressing Anger at British Petroleum

2010-06-20T23:20:00.004-04:00

This video is visually interesting and would be even if there wasn't an anti British Petroleum message which is completed at the end. (Hat Tip: It's My Right to Be Left of Center)

Watch on YouTube!

The Famous British Petroleum Coffee Spill Video

2010-06-13T12:28:00.001-04:00

In case you haven't caught it yet... (Hat Tip: Cultured Cat)

Alabama Politician Lectures Others About Speaking English

2010-06-02T07:42:00.003-04:00

Tim James, running for the Gopper nomination for governor in Alabama, dares to demand other people speak English. Unfortunately for him, he doesn't speak English either. He speaks Cracker.

Tim James' campaign video -- Language @ Yahoo! Video

BP Killed Spongebob Squarepants

2010-06-01T19:42:00.001-04:00

I hate Spongebob, but I hate BP more. (Swiped from Mock, Paper, Scissors)

Wanting Better Wangs

2010-05-28T08:45:00.003-04:00

I was watching a bit of Corporate News Network while stretching at the gym, and they had a fabulous closed captioning blooper. Captioning live TV is bound to be error prone, but this was one of the better ones.

The story was about strikes at Honda plants in China. The captioning for the story said the "workers want better wangs."

I think wang improvement is a laudable goal worldwide.

Funny Atheist Webcast About Draw Muhammad Day

2010-05-18T20:29:00.001-04:00

Betty White Says "Lesbian"

2010-05-11T06:57:00.001-04:00

Swiped from Grace the Spot:

Betty White On SNL

2010-05-09T17:17:00.003-04:00

Get some while she's hot!

She's even a good interview.

That Funny Muscleboy Strikes Again

2010-04-18T07:20:00.000-04:00

I doubt this guy can really wrestle, but....

Protect Your Kid From Catholic Priests

2010-04-17T20:44:00.001-04:00

This is one of the most important stories ever on the Onion Network News.

Ex-Pedophile Shares Tips On How To Make Your Kids Less Attractive

Too Bad Divine Can't Run in 2012

2010-04-12T19:00:00.000-04:00

She wouldn't be worse than the Republicans and Democrats.

More of That Funny Hunk

2010-04-05T07:02:00.002-04:00

This guy is very hot, and very silly.

The Saggy Pants Crisis

2010-04-04T08:15:00.001-04:00

Here's some unintentional humor from a New York politician who has forgotten what it's like to be young. If you think his rhetoric is over the top, then you would be correct.

The younger generation always has fashions and attitudes that offend and baffle the older generation.

Rough Men

2010-04-03T12:38:00.001-04:00

Submission wrestling is hot.

Cooking with Jesus

2010-04-02T21:53:00.001-04:00

I love Mrs. Betty Bowers.

Sarah Palin's New Show

2010-03-30T19:11:00.000-04:00

Considering Palin's death threats against Democrats, I wonder if she plans on cooking and eating them too.

Priest Off

2010-03-29T21:07:00.001-04:00

Sometimes laughter is easier than tears.

(Hat Tip: From the Left)

Academy Award Winning Movie Parody

2010-03-28T12:31:00.002-04:00

This squeezes so many cliches into so little space. It's amazing.

(Hat Tip: Ten Percent)

Cat vs. Vacuum Cleaner

2010-03-26T21:47:00.001-04:00

No message here. It's just funny and interesting. (Hat Tip: Mock, Paper, Scissors)

Another Episode of Onward Christian Dullards

2010-03-23T20:39:00.002-04:00

It's finally here, Episode 12 of Onward Christian Dullards: . Danger! Dullards Approaching the Workplace!.

Time for you to have some fun with militant fundamentalism. If you are knew to this sinful web comedy/soap, you can start at the start with Episode 1.

I've Stolen Another Meme

2010-03-23T18:49:00.000-04:00

Poor My 2 Cents. I keep stealing memes that were stolen there fair and square. Here's the latest.

Negativity meme.

Foods which disgust the crap out of me: Okra, Beef, Hush Puppies, and Liver would be a good start.

TV show I loathe: Every unreality show.

Movie I loathe: Inglorious Bassterds by the inglorious asswipe, Quentin Tarentino, is the latest.

Music genres I loathe: Country Western Torture (cwt)

Magazine which annoys me: Anything by Martha Stewart

Makes me cranky at restaurant: children

Makes me cranky in public: children

Makes me cranky in general: obsessive hyphenation

Pisses me off at home: bottoms that don’t put the rubber on me. (I'm actually stealing the answer because I feel the same way.)

Pisses me off at work: My psychotic coworker.

Pisses me off in general: hot guys who are tops

Makes me impatient at home: Waiting for web pages to load.

Makes me impatient at work: any time before quittin time

Makes me impatient in public: people who walk slowly on sidewalks and don't give you room to get around them.

Celebrity I hate: Simon what's his name.

Music artist I hate: Justin Timberlake

I could care less about: Sarah Palin's breasts, but that doesn't stop her from showing them off all the time.

Annoys the crap out of me weekdays: waking up to an alarm

Annoys the crap out of me weekends: too $@#%#$ short

Blogger’s habit that annoys you: posts apologizing for not posting

Feature on your blog you hate: If I hated a feature on my blog, it would be gone.

Movie star you despise: Chuck Norris

Politician that you hate: all of them

Part of the Original Church Lady Skit

2010-03-20T18:45:00.002-04:00

My temporary obsession with The Church Lady continues with some video I found on YouTube from part of the original SNL skit where she appeared.

The Church Lady Fights Saaaaaatan

2010-03-15T20:06:00.000-04:00

Well, Isn't That Extra Special!

2010-03-12T06:37:00.002-05:00

It's still relevant today.

Another Stolen Meme

2010-03-07T08:04:00.002-05:00

I like stealing memes from My2Cents, who steals them from others gleefully.

What If meme…

1. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
I couldn't limit myself to one person.

2. You can flip a switch that will wipe any band or musical artist out of existence. Which one will it be?
Pat Boone

3. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
Jon Stewart

4. What is your favorite cheese?
White stilton

5. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your immediate disposal. What kind will you make?
Turkey, cranberry, and arugula on mulitgrain bread

6. You have the opportunity to sleep with the movie celebrity of your choice. We are talking no-strings-attached sex and it can only happen once. Who is the lucky celebrity of your choice?
Dennis Quaid

7. You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who do you pick?
Trent Reznor

8. Now that you’ve slept with two different people in a row, you seem to be having an excellent day because you just came across a hundred-dollar bill on the sidewalk. Holy shit, a hundred bucks! How are you gonna spend it?
A fresh supply of caffeine. I will have worn myself out fucking them.

9. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?
Berlin

10. Upon arrival to the aforementioned location, you get off the plane and discover another hundred-dollar bill. Shit! Now that you are in the new location, what are you gonna do?
Wonder why I found a $100 bill in Berlin

11. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. It is…?
Already working if I think I'm seeing an angel.

12. Rufus appears out of nowhere with a time-traveling phone booth. You can go anytime in the PAST. What time are you traveling to and what are you going to do when you get there?
NYC a week ago to do a lottery ticket with the winning numbers.

13. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?
Religion is banned.

14. You have been given the opportunity to create the half-hour TV show of your own design. What is it called and what’s the premise?
Fire Donald Trump! This would be an unreality show where somebody gets to fire that POS.

15.What is your favorite curse word?
Cheney!

16.One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren’t really doing anything, they’re just standing around your bed. What do you do?
Promise myself to never hook up on Craigslist again.

17. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the item?
My nunzilla!

18. The Angel of Death has descended upon you. Fortunately, the Angel of Death is pretty cool and in a good mood, and it offers you a half-hour to do whatever you want before you bite it. Whatcha gonna do in that half-hour?
Kill the angel of death. Duh.

19. You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What’s it gonna be?
Transforming air into $100 bills.

20. You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?
Fucking the hell out of this 6'5" hairy muscleman.

21.You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
The day I found out that most people were heterosexual.

22. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world! Bitchin’! What country are you going to live in now?
Canada. It will be easier to spend my US $100 bills there.

23. This question still counts, even for those of you who are under age. Check it out. You have been eternally banned from every single bar in the world except for ONE. Which one is it gonna be?
Whatever the Dugout is called these days.

24. Hopefully you didn’t mention this in the super-powers question…. If you did, then we’ll just expand on that. Check it out… Suddenly, you have gained the ability to FLOAT!!! Whose house are you going to float to first, and be like “Dude, check it out…I can FLOAT!”?
Sarah Palin's. I want her to be able to see me from her house.

25. The constant absorption of magical moonbeams mixed with the radioactive vegetables you consumed earlier has given you the ability to resurrect the dead famous-person of your choice. So which celebrity will you bring back to life?
Charles Nelson Reilly

26. The Celestial Gates of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person, etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?
My grandfather on my mother's side.

27. What’s your theme song?
Closer, by NIN.

Noah's Ark-God, Giraffes & Genocide

2010-03-06T09:58:00.000-05:00

This is pretty funny.

Hot Muscleboy Tries to Act Like Macho Top Man

2010-02-27T21:00:00.000-05:00

I bet he's a total bottom in real life, which would make him a whole lot of fun. Anyway, there's a lot of unintentional humor in the porn industry. (The video is swiped from The Lisp)

Meme Swiping for Saturday - The 6ws Meme

2010-02-27T20:45:00.001-05:00

I stole this from My 2 Cents who stole it from body else, who stole it from somebody else, and so on.

This is the 6Ws meme.

Who…
Is easy to love? Somebody who bribes me with sex and chocolate
Do you just wanna smack? Can you line up a bunch of banksters for me? Ratzi would work too.
Do you trust? Me, Dennis Kucinich, and that hot guy I saw at the gym
Do you talk to when you’re alone? I don't talk to anybody when I'm alone.

What…
Dangerous things do you do while driving? I drive early in the morning sometimes before I'm really awake.
Are you allergic to? Cigarette smoke, Republicans, and people who are always Jesusing at me
Is Satan’s last name? Murdoch.
Is the freakiest thing in your house? My Obsessive Compulsive action figure

When…
Is it time to turn over a new leaf? Never, let it fall and mulch your garden.
Will you be all that you can be? Is this an ad for Army recruiting?
Is enough enough? There's never enough hot sex or chocolate.
Do you go to the dark side? When It's Hot Outside

Where…
Are your pants? If you were hotter, they would be around my ankles.
Is your last will and testament? I'm giving all my money to people who will throw pies at Sarah Palin and that annoying guy from American Idol.
Is your junk food stash? Fuck that. You stole from my last one.
Is Carmen Sandiego? Wherever Lou Dobbs is located. She is Dobbs in drag.

Why…
Was the Lone Ranger alone? He was almost as ugly as your average teabagger.
Was The Scarlet Letter scarlet? To get people all hot and bothered
Are musicians sexy and plumbers not? My plumber is hot.
Are there no seat belts on school buses? To prove that there are people who find children even more irritating than I do.

Would you…
Swim the English Channel for a doughnut and coffee? I wouldn't even try to do it for a guaranteed chance to fuck Dennis Quaid.
Forgive someone who deliberately hurt you? No, but I might fake it while extracting my revenge.
Rather believe a lie if it hurt you less than the truth? Nah, it just means repressing the hurt which bites you in the ass.
You still be alive if you were sucked out of an airplane window? If I was getting the blow job while the plane was on the ground.

"Cooking with Republicans"

2010-02-26T20:39:00.001-05:00

This video was swiped from Blue Gal.

I was never that fond of Astroglide, but I digress.

"Clean Coal" Snark Animation

2010-02-20T22:23:00.002-05:00

I like Mark Fiore.

He's pretty cute too.

Curling Is Hysterical

2010-02-18T22:02:00.003-05:00

This week, I saw curling for the first time at the gym on TV, and I can't get enough. It's still funny, no matter how much I watch. Here's some curling that isn't from the Olympics so you can share in the giggles.

They actually train for curling. LOL

By the way, curling was invented in Scotland, and I'm more Scottish than anything else.

How to Speak Teabag

2010-02-15T16:13:00.001-05:00

Hat Tip: Look at This Fucking Teabagger

Want to Look At Some Pics of Hot Guys

2010-02-14T09:00:00.000-05:00

These Flickr photostreams will keep you busy.

Hairy Jaques

hairywrestlerfan1

You can thank me when you are...ahem...finished.

Us Deluded Atheists

2010-02-13T09:07:00.001-05:00

This giggle worthy YouTube thang was swiped from The New Atheist.

Palin Mispronounces "Nuclear"

2010-02-07T22:28:00.002-05:00

I still can't figure out where the addled think a second "u" can be found in "nuclear."

Make Your Own Batman Comic Panel

2010-02-07T16:48:00.003-05:00

You can make your own.

Hat Tip: Mock, Paper, Scissors